Towards the end of the stay in Nevada, I was let go from the plumbing job. I worked it long enough to learn I was a lousy plumber, although I did pick up some rudimentary plumbing skills.
After I was unemployed in Nevada, we decided it was time to get out. I turned to blogging, which I had become quite proficient at by that time. I was offered what seemed like a great offer: a house in the TX Panhandle at what seemed like a great price to someone accustomed to houses worth six figures.
Unfortunately, we were unprepared both financially and emotionally for home ownership, and that situation became worse through our own neglect.
I spent the next two years throwing newspapers. I was still unprepared to deal with people and really had little experience handling conflict. I operated on the "if you ignore it long enough, it will go away" principle. I wasn't a good neighbor, I wasn't a good friend, and I wasn't a good father or husband at the time. I was coasting
So what brought me out of it? What changed? The realization that mountains weren't going to move unless I set about moving them. The understanding that success is often the result of planning and perserverance, not of luck and lottery.
It didn't come overnight. I went back to school first with the idea of attending a web design class. The school wasn't set up for folks who wanted to take some random class, though, and I had to enroll as a student to take the course.
After I was enrolled, I was steered towards the Network Technology degree plan. I got into it, and about halfway through decided I wasn't ready to stop with my Associates. That led to my enrolling to finish up the final two years towards a Bachelors.
There was a steep learning curve those two years. To start off with, we burned a few bridges, first with the family that had been kind enough to help us with our relocation to the Panhandle. Again, the lack of ability to handle conflict came into play, and to say we handled that poorly would be an understatement. I still didn't have a firm grip on the concept of "planning" and we moved out on the spur of the moment, leaving a lot of things unfinished.
The next two years were grueling. There were a lot of weeks with no free time, and I would come home and collapse, watching movies to motivate me and help me keep going. Quitting at that point was not an option, although it did at times seem to have its appeal.
My point in telling all of this is to explain that not only do I understand some of the inner thought process of those who choose to stay poor, but I have, I think, a unique perspective of how to get out and how those truly concerned with issues of poverty can help.
First, "things" don't help as much as people think they do. We had an abundance of castoff furniture, clothing and trinkets; enough that we couldn't possibly hope to manage it. Both because we had spent substantial time in poverty and because we felt beholden to those who donated the items, we didn't throw them out, we piled them up. In moving from the one house, I discovered painfully that a room we were using for storage had been overtaken by mice (it doesn't take as long as one would think), and that was the reason we had trouble eradicating them from the rest of the house. Piling up "things" when you lack good planning skills is, in essence, a bad idea. Strike that -- it's a HORRIBLE idea.
Second, personal involvement helps a LOT, but you have to be fairly rugged to do it. I can't say that someone directly and personally involved in our lives would have helped tons, unless it was a VERY persistent person, because I'm a very stubborn one. Unlearning habits of poverty means accepting and acknowledging personal weakness, and a person who has spent a lot of time in survival mode is usually somewhat short on those skills. It takes a gradual, gentle approach at times, and a bit of a smack upside the head at others. That smack upside the head may hurt at first, but once the pain subsides, and you sit back and analyze it, you come away with a MUCH clearer understanding.
Third, money is a "sometimes" thing. Throwing money at the problem doesn't address the underlying issues; it only postpones them. But there are some problems, some situations that require a monetary solution, and that's where individual, direct investment in someone's life can help to address that. But money itself is at best a salve.
Fourth, politics is not the solution. Politicians can help, of course, by steering resources to those working to address those problems, but ultimately, problem solving requires being above politics, being beyond them.
Fifth, accountability is key. Blame helps noone, and ultimately, the only person to get out of poverty will be the person who got themselves into it in the first place. People standing on the sidelines can help, they can advise, but they can't fix it.
Sixth, it doesn't come quickly and it doesn't come easily. Getting into poverty doesn't come easy, neither does getting out. It takes involvement, investment, and hard work. You ultimately have to decide that there is no option for failure.
There are, of course, those who are poor because of circumstances entirely beyond their control. And we need a way to help them, to give them the means for their own escape from poverty. But while some may choose poverty, it is still my contention that nobody WANTS poverty; they just are not aware that there is another way.
As for me and my family, we've still got a ways to go. It's a day by day thing. But ultimately I've come to realize that we are the ones who need to make sure that if we aren't happy with our circumstances, we should set about to change them. But I also see a lot of other folks struggling, and believe that it is our mission as Christians to reach out, to be the hands and feet of Christ, and to offer them both hope and help.
Friday, September 21, 2012
Understanding Those who "Choose" to be Poor -- Part 1
As the push towards the 2012 elections continues, poverty has come to the forefront, and for good reason: more Americans than ever are on food stamps, and a good number of people (drawing not only on polls but empirical knowledge) are increasingly desperate and uncertain about their future.
One of the long held assertions of Republicans is that the poor "choose" to be poor. Like all stereotypes, there are enough people who do choose to be poor that it's easy to point in their direction and make a stereotype that fits. But there's a strong untruth that isn't revealed in this simple statement: while some people may CHOOSE to be poor, nobody WANTS to be poor.
And the difference is something that needs to be understood by our leaders, our ministers, anyone who has any desire to deal with the issues of poverty.
I'm going to draw on my personal experience here, as for a good portion of my life, I was one who chose poverty. Not a welfare lifestyle, but poverty nonetheless. For reasons I won't go into here, I eschewed higher education, and although I briefly attended college, I just as quickly left it behind, choosing hand to mouth employment in the restaurants, factories, and ultimately in homecare.
The reason was simple: from about 18-27, I didn't believe I would live past the age of 30. This wasn't just a fatalistic post-adolescent angst thing: I buried one younger brother at 16 and another at 23. And nothing in the world around me gave me hope for greater optimism. I believed I had a ticking clock, and I lived like it.
When I was 27, I made the decision to move into homecare. I decided it was time to gain a sense of purpose, a sense of working towards the long term. And I loved it at first, and put everything into it. But I burned out quickly, and I quit about 3 years after I actually should have. I went to working at WalMart briefly because I had become so overtaken by circumstances that I simply couldn't handle being around people.
Leading up to this, though, I did see what was happening, and did what I could to forestall the inevitable. At one point, I even went to my pastor trying to explain what I thought was depression (but later learned was despair -- I was overloaded, ill equipped, and worn out). He came back to me with the simple answer that he had spoken to his wife asking about depression, and she stated "I think all men suffer from it". That was it. No honest, sincere attempt to reach out, to be there...at a time when I really needed him.
Keep in mind these are not words of bitterness -- I'm beyond that. These are words to help people who wonder what leads to poverty and how they can help.
At the same time, my support system was crumbling. I had spent several years trying to rebuild a relationship with my father, only to see him becoming increasingly bitter, cynical and critical -- at a time when I needed people to help me through. I was long on problems, and short on answers.
And the bills were mounting. And having mouths to feed at home certainly didn't help.
In desperation, I did the only thing I knew how to do, an incredibly stupid decision in retrospective, but one that had a fortunately positive outcome -- I ran.
We didn't discuss it with most folks around us, just picked up and left and headed out west, ostensibly to start fresh, but with no knowledge of where we were going or what we were doing. I often liken it to Paul Theroux's protagonist in "The Mosquito Coast" -- I was trying to move forward, but was acting in desperation, not in common sense, and I had no idea where I was going.
This led us to nearly a year in the Nevada desert, where I worked a variety of jobs, from mining to laying septic in the middle of the mojave desert, to day labor. It was backbreaking work, and it was uncertain. On top of that, we hit at the peak of housing in Southern Nevada, and rents were insanely high. Add to that low wages, and our financial situation was not improving.
I'll summarize the "rest of the story" in the post following.
One of the long held assertions of Republicans is that the poor "choose" to be poor. Like all stereotypes, there are enough people who do choose to be poor that it's easy to point in their direction and make a stereotype that fits. But there's a strong untruth that isn't revealed in this simple statement: while some people may CHOOSE to be poor, nobody WANTS to be poor.
And the difference is something that needs to be understood by our leaders, our ministers, anyone who has any desire to deal with the issues of poverty.
I'm going to draw on my personal experience here, as for a good portion of my life, I was one who chose poverty. Not a welfare lifestyle, but poverty nonetheless. For reasons I won't go into here, I eschewed higher education, and although I briefly attended college, I just as quickly left it behind, choosing hand to mouth employment in the restaurants, factories, and ultimately in homecare.
The reason was simple: from about 18-27, I didn't believe I would live past the age of 30. This wasn't just a fatalistic post-adolescent angst thing: I buried one younger brother at 16 and another at 23. And nothing in the world around me gave me hope for greater optimism. I believed I had a ticking clock, and I lived like it.
When I was 27, I made the decision to move into homecare. I decided it was time to gain a sense of purpose, a sense of working towards the long term. And I loved it at first, and put everything into it. But I burned out quickly, and I quit about 3 years after I actually should have. I went to working at WalMart briefly because I had become so overtaken by circumstances that I simply couldn't handle being around people.
Leading up to this, though, I did see what was happening, and did what I could to forestall the inevitable. At one point, I even went to my pastor trying to explain what I thought was depression (but later learned was despair -- I was overloaded, ill equipped, and worn out). He came back to me with the simple answer that he had spoken to his wife asking about depression, and she stated "I think all men suffer from it". That was it. No honest, sincere attempt to reach out, to be there...at a time when I really needed him.
Keep in mind these are not words of bitterness -- I'm beyond that. These are words to help people who wonder what leads to poverty and how they can help.
At the same time, my support system was crumbling. I had spent several years trying to rebuild a relationship with my father, only to see him becoming increasingly bitter, cynical and critical -- at a time when I needed people to help me through. I was long on problems, and short on answers.
And the bills were mounting. And having mouths to feed at home certainly didn't help.
In desperation, I did the only thing I knew how to do, an incredibly stupid decision in retrospective, but one that had a fortunately positive outcome -- I ran.
We didn't discuss it with most folks around us, just picked up and left and headed out west, ostensibly to start fresh, but with no knowledge of where we were going or what we were doing. I often liken it to Paul Theroux's protagonist in "The Mosquito Coast" -- I was trying to move forward, but was acting in desperation, not in common sense, and I had no idea where I was going.
This led us to nearly a year in the Nevada desert, where I worked a variety of jobs, from mining to laying septic in the middle of the mojave desert, to day labor. It was backbreaking work, and it was uncertain. On top of that, we hit at the peak of housing in Southern Nevada, and rents were insanely high. Add to that low wages, and our financial situation was not improving.
I'll summarize the "rest of the story" in the post following.
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Thoughts on the New Year
A new year has begun. The nation is in political conflict, 1.5 million Americans are homeless, 27.7% of US children live below the poverty line, and nearly 48% of Americans live at or near the poverty line.
It sounds bleak, and, indeed, positive news and positive thoughts are in short supply. If I were to go from empirical observation I wuld say that less than 10% of the people I have encountered believe that on January 1, 2013 we will look back on the year in positive reflection.
But it does not have to be that way. While I myself have questions and doubts on what the coming year will bring, I can say one thing with certainty: if we all believe that the coming year will be negative, it will be.
I do realize certain things happen that are beyond our control. Sickness, famine, natural disasters, wars. But these things all happen in good years and bad. And while there is a temptation to mourn what we have lost, it is our choice to celebrate new opportunities and new beginnings.
To that end, I am personally making the following declarations for the New Year. Not resolutions, I don't believe in those, but a declaration I can use as a benchmark next January:
--I will be salt and light in 2012. While we may curse the darkness, it is imperative to understand that the darkest hours are when the light is most needed.
--I will endeavor to the best of my ability to embrace adversity for the challenges it brings and not shun adversity for the sake of my own comfort.
--I will work passionately to be the hands and feet of Jesus, actively and passionately seeking opportunities to serve, to build, to nurture and to heal.
--I will not knowingly allow a single person to pass by my door with a need without attempting to fill it. If I cannot fill it, I will attempt to find someone who can.
--I will focus on others and not self in the coming year. While I will not focus on self denial, I will place my wants below the needs of others.
--I will work diligently to encourage others to maintain a positive focus and work to make a better and brighter future.
In closing, I would like to leave you with the following words of encouragement:
3 Not only so, but we[a] also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4 perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5 And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. --Romans 5:3-5 NIV
Be blessed and let's embrace every day we have as a challenge that we will rise to accept.
It sounds bleak, and, indeed, positive news and positive thoughts are in short supply. If I were to go from empirical observation I wuld say that less than 10% of the people I have encountered believe that on January 1, 2013 we will look back on the year in positive reflection.
But it does not have to be that way. While I myself have questions and doubts on what the coming year will bring, I can say one thing with certainty: if we all believe that the coming year will be negative, it will be.
I do realize certain things happen that are beyond our control. Sickness, famine, natural disasters, wars. But these things all happen in good years and bad. And while there is a temptation to mourn what we have lost, it is our choice to celebrate new opportunities and new beginnings.
To that end, I am personally making the following declarations for the New Year. Not resolutions, I don't believe in those, but a declaration I can use as a benchmark next January:
--I will be salt and light in 2012. While we may curse the darkness, it is imperative to understand that the darkest hours are when the light is most needed.
--I will endeavor to the best of my ability to embrace adversity for the challenges it brings and not shun adversity for the sake of my own comfort.
--I will work passionately to be the hands and feet of Jesus, actively and passionately seeking opportunities to serve, to build, to nurture and to heal.
--I will not knowingly allow a single person to pass by my door with a need without attempting to fill it. If I cannot fill it, I will attempt to find someone who can.
--I will focus on others and not self in the coming year. While I will not focus on self denial, I will place my wants below the needs of others.
--I will work diligently to encourage others to maintain a positive focus and work to make a better and brighter future.
In closing, I would like to leave you with the following words of encouragement:
3 Not only so, but we[a] also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4 perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5 And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. --Romans 5:3-5 NIV
Be blessed and let's embrace every day we have as a challenge that we will rise to accept.
Friday, December 30, 2011
The Weight of the Cross
I'm well aware that December 25 was not likely the birth of Jesus. But that fact does not change the fact that it is the date many Christians celebrate the birth of Jesus. That and the upcoming New Year make it an appropriate time for reflection and planning for the upcoming year.
For those of you who are not familiar with my Hobo's Listblog, I spent my Christmas Eve and Christmas Day feeding Amarillo's homeless without the permit the city requires for such action.
Christmas Eve went off with nary a hitch (I had to bail at 3, though, leaving Rusty Tomlinson and Joseph Hayes to man the feeding table (Joseph went all 8 hours both days!). But Christmas Day was different. The snow began in earnest shortly after we set up and continued on until just before we were finishing up, at times limiting visibility to less than 500 feet. As the snow melted on the cuff of my pants it numbed my skin, and late in the day despite taking breaks to the van to warm up, I was beginning to fear the possibility of frostbite.
The snow was, in all honesty, probably the best Christmas present I could have received. Not only did it give me pause to reflect on the reality of homelessness, but equal pause to reflect on what it truly means to be a Christian.
I wish I could say I made the connection immediately, but it wasn't until later in the week, lulled by the hum of my van's engine as I drove the width of the Texas Panhandle, that I began to think about the significance of the storm in relation to my faith.
Before Jesus was crucified, not only did he endure the taunts of the crowd, but 39 lashes, literally to the edge of death. On that fateful day when he was burdened with the load of the cross, this once strong carpenter was weakened and humiliated to a point of exhaustion...yet even in His weakened state, He still had to carry the cross to the point of His execution.
Not only did He bear this burden but He instructed us in Matthew 16:24 to follow His example, to deny ourselves, take up our cross and follow Him. The implication was that WE had a burden to bear and a price to pay if we count ourselves as Jesus' followers.
In Deitrich Bonhoeffer's book, The Cost of Discipleship, Bonhoeffer makes mention of "cheap grace". He describes it as follows:
Cheap grace is the grace we bestow on ourselves. Cheap grace is the preaching of forgiveness without requiring repentance, baptism without church discipline, Communion without confession.... Cheap grace is grace without discipleship, grace without the cross, grace without Jesus Christ, living and incarnate
Somewhere along the way, we've allowed cheap grace to dominate our doctrine. "Checkbook charity" has replaced personal investment, and grace has been reduced to little more than a shiny bauble obtained by a walk up the aisle during the longest playing of "Just as I Am" ever played. We've missed the commands to heal the sick, feed the poor visit those in prison, and to love our neighbor as ourselves. In fact, if we even KNOW our neighbor, we are a rarity.
In the late hours of our Christmas feeding, the reality of what it means to truly serve Christ was once again impressed on me. I had certainly understood it before, but there is something about enduring beyond where you thought you could that puts an indelible stamp on it.
As the New Year approaches, I would like to encourage everyone to seek out opportunities to live their faith in ways that truly demonstrate the presence of Christ in your lives. Do hard things, push yourselves beyond your comfort zone and live your faith out loud. It is, I believe, what the world needs most right now.
For those of you who are not familiar with my Hobo's Listblog, I spent my Christmas Eve and Christmas Day feeding Amarillo's homeless without the permit the city requires for such action.
Christmas Eve went off with nary a hitch (I had to bail at 3, though, leaving Rusty Tomlinson and Joseph Hayes to man the feeding table (Joseph went all 8 hours both days!). But Christmas Day was different. The snow began in earnest shortly after we set up and continued on until just before we were finishing up, at times limiting visibility to less than 500 feet. As the snow melted on the cuff of my pants it numbed my skin, and late in the day despite taking breaks to the van to warm up, I was beginning to fear the possibility of frostbite.
The snow was, in all honesty, probably the best Christmas present I could have received. Not only did it give me pause to reflect on the reality of homelessness, but equal pause to reflect on what it truly means to be a Christian.
I wish I could say I made the connection immediately, but it wasn't until later in the week, lulled by the hum of my van's engine as I drove the width of the Texas Panhandle, that I began to think about the significance of the storm in relation to my faith.
Before Jesus was crucified, not only did he endure the taunts of the crowd, but 39 lashes, literally to the edge of death. On that fateful day when he was burdened with the load of the cross, this once strong carpenter was weakened and humiliated to a point of exhaustion...yet even in His weakened state, He still had to carry the cross to the point of His execution.
Not only did He bear this burden but He instructed us in Matthew 16:24 to follow His example, to deny ourselves, take up our cross and follow Him. The implication was that WE had a burden to bear and a price to pay if we count ourselves as Jesus' followers.
In Deitrich Bonhoeffer's book, The Cost of Discipleship, Bonhoeffer makes mention of "cheap grace". He describes it as follows:
Cheap grace is the grace we bestow on ourselves. Cheap grace is the preaching of forgiveness without requiring repentance, baptism without church discipline, Communion without confession.... Cheap grace is grace without discipleship, grace without the cross, grace without Jesus Christ, living and incarnate
Somewhere along the way, we've allowed cheap grace to dominate our doctrine. "Checkbook charity" has replaced personal investment, and grace has been reduced to little more than a shiny bauble obtained by a walk up the aisle during the longest playing of "Just as I Am" ever played. We've missed the commands to heal the sick, feed the poor visit those in prison, and to love our neighbor as ourselves. In fact, if we even KNOW our neighbor, we are a rarity.
In the late hours of our Christmas feeding, the reality of what it means to truly serve Christ was once again impressed on me. I had certainly understood it before, but there is something about enduring beyond where you thought you could that puts an indelible stamp on it.
As the New Year approaches, I would like to encourage everyone to seek out opportunities to live their faith in ways that truly demonstrate the presence of Christ in your lives. Do hard things, push yourselves beyond your comfort zone and live your faith out loud. It is, I believe, what the world needs most right now.
Monday, November 21, 2011
Why Don't More People Believe in Jesus?
This is a hotbed issue for me. We live in an age where many people openly question (or outright deny) the existence of God and/or the existence of Jesus. Oddly enough, pastors in the pulpits have been scratching their heads for years trying to figure out why.
For some inexplicable reason, some folks seem to be figuring that there aren't enough latte bars in the churches. So they build coffeeshops. Or maybe professional multimedia presentations. So they invest in a production crew, using money raised from tithes (which were intended as a "storehouse" for the poor and needy) to pay the crew and to produce fancy films explaining away the plan of salvation.
It's nothing new; in fact if I say that the moneychangers are taking over the temple, I will get nods of agreement even in these same circles.
I am reminded on a regular basis, though, that people are ALWAYS drawn to sincere, heartfelt expressions of Christian faith. Recently, when driving in to get some supplies from a local store, I passed a woman outside with a sign that simply said "Out of Gas". Now, having tried to do things for the poor and the homeless for many years, I am ALWAYS skeptical when I see people in that situation. I'm no fool, and I've seen every con job there is. And so I thought long and hard about whether I should stop and help. She was not in a place where I could stop and learn her story, and besides, even getting someone's story is not the best tell. The people who are experts at gaming the system have the best stories, and the people who truly need help are often so embarrased at having to ask that their apprehension could very easily be mistaken for dishonesty.
So (not to my credit, but to God's), I decided to help her without knowing more of the backstory. It's God's money anyways, and I figure if someone "takes advantage" of what I give them, it was never my money in the first place, and thus it is not my place to be offended. I did, for a moment, wonder if it was the wisest thing.
I didn't have to wait long for an answer. Her tears and gratitude gave me all of the answer I needed.
We live in a world where it's easy to be callous. We've been gamed so many times, we've had people take advantage of our good nature (and, to my own discredit, I have at times sadly taken advantage of others' good natures), that we've become cynics. We want to help, but we want to know that we're helping and not enabling. In other words (and this stings as much to type as it likely does to read), we often attach strings to our "generosity".
The truth is, if we attach strings, it's not generosity, it's a transaction.
The reason more people don't believe in Jesus is because they don't SEE Jesus. We TALK about trusting God, but we make sure to pay up our insurance premiums. We use pithy platitudes like "God will provide", yet we keep our pantries full even when the local food bank is asking us what we can give. We hold back our blessings because we believe WE provided the blessings, not God. We have a form of Godliness, but deny its power, something we are warned against in 2 Timothy 3:1-5.
I believe that if more people SAW Jesus in a church willing to serve, they would believe, and they would follow.
Now, when I presented the story I came across the other day, I deliberately left off "the rest of the story" because, the truth is, this article was written more about the conviction in my own heart than it is the conviction I see in other people's lives. Here is the rest of the story:
I had spent the weekend in Dallas to represent Hobo's List and participate in the Occupy Dallas march. On the way down, I passed two guys walking on the side of the road. But I was on a schedule and stopping seemed rather inconvenient. On the way back, I passed at least one, but I was seriously wanting to get home. My rationalizations for passing them are irrelevant; the fact is that I did. The way back was also compounded with concerns about how much money was left for the remainder of the month. I had taken down a decent load of ewaste for recycling, but not enough to profit off of my trip. And, as always during this time of year, there was the impending fear of the approaching holidays.
But shortly before I pulled in to the store, I had called home to check in. My oldest daughter mentioned a rather generous holiday gift from some friends, one that certainly didn't take away the normal concerns about money, but did make some of those questions a little easier to answer.
In other words, I must reluctantly confess that I did not give out of my need, as with the widow's mite, but out of my excess.
If we want to change the way the church is perceived, perhaps the best way to do so is to change the way WE behave. If people see Christians as self absorbed materialists who talk a good game but have difficulty living it, that will affect how they respond. But if they see us as willing to give EVERYTHING to ensure the comforts of those who are less privileged than ourselves, then maybe, just maybe, they will see a church worth joining.
For some inexplicable reason, some folks seem to be figuring that there aren't enough latte bars in the churches. So they build coffeeshops. Or maybe professional multimedia presentations. So they invest in a production crew, using money raised from tithes (which were intended as a "storehouse" for the poor and needy) to pay the crew and to produce fancy films explaining away the plan of salvation.
It's nothing new; in fact if I say that the moneychangers are taking over the temple, I will get nods of agreement even in these same circles.
I am reminded on a regular basis, though, that people are ALWAYS drawn to sincere, heartfelt expressions of Christian faith. Recently, when driving in to get some supplies from a local store, I passed a woman outside with a sign that simply said "Out of Gas". Now, having tried to do things for the poor and the homeless for many years, I am ALWAYS skeptical when I see people in that situation. I'm no fool, and I've seen every con job there is. And so I thought long and hard about whether I should stop and help. She was not in a place where I could stop and learn her story, and besides, even getting someone's story is not the best tell. The people who are experts at gaming the system have the best stories, and the people who truly need help are often so embarrased at having to ask that their apprehension could very easily be mistaken for dishonesty.
So (not to my credit, but to God's), I decided to help her without knowing more of the backstory. It's God's money anyways, and I figure if someone "takes advantage" of what I give them, it was never my money in the first place, and thus it is not my place to be offended. I did, for a moment, wonder if it was the wisest thing.
I didn't have to wait long for an answer. Her tears and gratitude gave me all of the answer I needed.
We live in a world where it's easy to be callous. We've been gamed so many times, we've had people take advantage of our good nature (and, to my own discredit, I have at times sadly taken advantage of others' good natures), that we've become cynics. We want to help, but we want to know that we're helping and not enabling. In other words (and this stings as much to type as it likely does to read), we often attach strings to our "generosity".
The truth is, if we attach strings, it's not generosity, it's a transaction.
The reason more people don't believe in Jesus is because they don't SEE Jesus. We TALK about trusting God, but we make sure to pay up our insurance premiums. We use pithy platitudes like "God will provide", yet we keep our pantries full even when the local food bank is asking us what we can give. We hold back our blessings because we believe WE provided the blessings, not God. We have a form of Godliness, but deny its power, something we are warned against in 2 Timothy 3:1-5.
I believe that if more people SAW Jesus in a church willing to serve, they would believe, and they would follow.
Now, when I presented the story I came across the other day, I deliberately left off "the rest of the story" because, the truth is, this article was written more about the conviction in my own heart than it is the conviction I see in other people's lives. Here is the rest of the story:
I had spent the weekend in Dallas to represent Hobo's List and participate in the Occupy Dallas march. On the way down, I passed two guys walking on the side of the road. But I was on a schedule and stopping seemed rather inconvenient. On the way back, I passed at least one, but I was seriously wanting to get home. My rationalizations for passing them are irrelevant; the fact is that I did. The way back was also compounded with concerns about how much money was left for the remainder of the month. I had taken down a decent load of ewaste for recycling, but not enough to profit off of my trip. And, as always during this time of year, there was the impending fear of the approaching holidays.
But shortly before I pulled in to the store, I had called home to check in. My oldest daughter mentioned a rather generous holiday gift from some friends, one that certainly didn't take away the normal concerns about money, but did make some of those questions a little easier to answer.
In other words, I must reluctantly confess that I did not give out of my need, as with the widow's mite, but out of my excess.
If we want to change the way the church is perceived, perhaps the best way to do so is to change the way WE behave. If people see Christians as self absorbed materialists who talk a good game but have difficulty living it, that will affect how they respond. But if they see us as willing to give EVERYTHING to ensure the comforts of those who are less privileged than ourselves, then maybe, just maybe, they will see a church worth joining.
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
The War on Christmas
As the Christmas season draws nearer, we will soon see the endless parade of pundits who will declare the "war on Christmas". And they'll be compelling. They'll show you department store Santas out of a job, they'll show you clerks who are told to use generic holiday greetings...anything they can to convince you that Christmas has been crushed under the grinding wheels of political correctness.
The truth is, they are partly right and partly wrong. There IS a war on Christmas. But it's not being waged by the people we think.
Let me take you back to Christmas 1981. I was an 11 year old boy, and I knew we wouldn't have much for Christmas. We had moved over 1000 miles to our new home in our old station wagon, and were starting over: me, my sister, and three brothers, one of them four months old at the time. Our main concern was getting through the winter with what we had on hand.
We were new to the area, so we didn't know anybody, really. New school, new community, and we lived on such limited means that I doubt most folks in today's America could survive. We went to bed on Christmas Eve with a scattering of homemade presents underneath the remarkably dated aluminum foil Christmas tree that my mother had goten at a discount from working at a department store.
About midnight, we were awakened by a knock on the door. My mother opened it, and a guy in a cheap Santa suit came in with what seemed to us like a million presents, as well as food for the next day. One of those presents I still remember vividly: an Atari 2600, the "dream gift" for us. The Christmas we wouldn't have was saved by people from the church who didn't care that they didn't know us that well, al they cared was that we have a good Christmas.
One of my favorite Christmas songs is the Longfellow poem "Christmas Bells". I've always identified with the next to last verse:
And in despair I bowed my head/"There is no peace on earth", I said/"For hate is strong and mocks the song/Of Peace on Earth goodwill to men".
As Christians, we have a distinct duty to serve God by serving our fellow-man. Every time we put our own greeds above the needs of others in our community, we wage a war on Christmas. Every time we rationalize away our responsibility to the poor, we are waging a war on Christmas. Every night a child goes to bed hungry in this, the richest country in the world, we are waging a war on Christmas.
A "war on Christmas" can't be won by displacing the department store Santas. Christmas was never about Santa, or fancy gifts or conspicuous consumption. While Christmas means many things to many different cultures, in the Christian tradition, at least, it is about the Advent, the coming of Jesus Christ, a man who taught us to see others as higher than ourselves, and to serve "the least of these". When we as a society turn our backs on the poor and serve ourselves, we are waging the cruelest, bloodiest war on Christmas that can be waged. And the casualties can be seen underneath the freeway overpasses, in the back alleys, on the park benches, and in the slums and hovels of our inner cities. If you're looking for Jesus in the toy aisle at Target, you are definitely, most definitely looking in the wrong place.
If this Christmas, Christians would look to fulfill the instructions of Christ and to live in service to their fellow man not only on December 25 but also throughout the year, the war on Christmas will have been won. And suddenly we won't be so concerned about the presence or absence of the department store Santa. .
The truth is, they are partly right and partly wrong. There IS a war on Christmas. But it's not being waged by the people we think.
Let me take you back to Christmas 1981. I was an 11 year old boy, and I knew we wouldn't have much for Christmas. We had moved over 1000 miles to our new home in our old station wagon, and were starting over: me, my sister, and three brothers, one of them four months old at the time. Our main concern was getting through the winter with what we had on hand.
We were new to the area, so we didn't know anybody, really. New school, new community, and we lived on such limited means that I doubt most folks in today's America could survive. We went to bed on Christmas Eve with a scattering of homemade presents underneath the remarkably dated aluminum foil Christmas tree that my mother had goten at a discount from working at a department store.
About midnight, we were awakened by a knock on the door. My mother opened it, and a guy in a cheap Santa suit came in with what seemed to us like a million presents, as well as food for the next day. One of those presents I still remember vividly: an Atari 2600, the "dream gift" for us. The Christmas we wouldn't have was saved by people from the church who didn't care that they didn't know us that well, al they cared was that we have a good Christmas.
One of my favorite Christmas songs is the Longfellow poem "Christmas Bells". I've always identified with the next to last verse:
And in despair I bowed my head/"There is no peace on earth", I said/"For hate is strong and mocks the song/Of Peace on Earth goodwill to men".
As Christians, we have a distinct duty to serve God by serving our fellow-man. Every time we put our own greeds above the needs of others in our community, we wage a war on Christmas. Every time we rationalize away our responsibility to the poor, we are waging a war on Christmas. Every night a child goes to bed hungry in this, the richest country in the world, we are waging a war on Christmas.
A "war on Christmas" can't be won by displacing the department store Santas. Christmas was never about Santa, or fancy gifts or conspicuous consumption. While Christmas means many things to many different cultures, in the Christian tradition, at least, it is about the Advent, the coming of Jesus Christ, a man who taught us to see others as higher than ourselves, and to serve "the least of these". When we as a society turn our backs on the poor and serve ourselves, we are waging the cruelest, bloodiest war on Christmas that can be waged. And the casualties can be seen underneath the freeway overpasses, in the back alleys, on the park benches, and in the slums and hovels of our inner cities. If you're looking for Jesus in the toy aisle at Target, you are definitely, most definitely looking in the wrong place.
If this Christmas, Christians would look to fulfill the instructions of Christ and to live in service to their fellow man not only on December 25 but also throughout the year, the war on Christmas will have been won. And suddenly we won't be so concerned about the presence or absence of the department store Santa. .
Monday, October 31, 2011
Where is the Church?
Warning: I'm about to get a bit personal here.
There are days that I sit back and woner where the church is? Today is one of those days.
Many, many years ago (a bit over 22), I came into a felt relationship with Christ. I saw that I needed hope and deliverance from the life I was leading.
At the time, I had a vibrant faith community. These were truly incredible, truly awesome people with a deep and abiding love for God. They tried in so many way to reach out to me, but I losed myself off and away from them.
As the years went by, I went through various churches and began to develop an awareness of the fellowship I was missing. To this date, I have never found it again, and I can't help but marvel at the irony that when I didn't want the help, it was there; when I needed it, it was nowhere to be found.
I've tried to steer that need, tried to channel it into a ministry of my own, but I can't. There are aspects of it that I can't do, where I am ill equipped. And in the meantime, I've punched the clock on job after job that might mean something to someone else, but means very little to me.
I am exhausted. I am sick, tired, and fed up.
And yet, in all of this, I have to ask: WHERE IS THE CHURCH? God set a very specific plan in place, and charged His people with feeding His flock. Feeding the hungry, healing the sick, housing the homeless, befriending the lonely...all...ALL of it fits under God's plan. Yet we'd rather fill ourselves with pithy feel good stories, show up on Sunday and put our money in the plate and all it good.
A few years ago, a famous author put out a book called "The Prayer of Jabez". It was a bestseller. Unfortunately, it was as misguided as it was popular. See, the author thought that Jabez was simply looking to get wealthy and that God rewarded him. Wrong; Jabez' prayer was that he would no longer cause pain to those around him.
I know that prayer because I've prayed it myself many times over. And I know that others know that prayer because you can see it expressed in the song "Hurt", recorded by Nine Inch Nails and later Johnny Cash.
We live in a world where we think "stuff" eases pain. Where is we create enough noise, perhaps we cannot hear the cry of our conscience when we see a hungry child, or a homeless man walking the streets asking us to spare just a pittance of the wealth with which we have been blessed.
We can do better. We MUST do better. Now is the time for the church to act. Never have we been more needed. Please take the time to reach out to your friends and family, to love them as Jesus loved them, and to just listen. You will give them more than you know.
There are days that I sit back and woner where the church is? Today is one of those days.
Many, many years ago (a bit over 22), I came into a felt relationship with Christ. I saw that I needed hope and deliverance from the life I was leading.
At the time, I had a vibrant faith community. These were truly incredible, truly awesome people with a deep and abiding love for God. They tried in so many way to reach out to me, but I losed myself off and away from them.
As the years went by, I went through various churches and began to develop an awareness of the fellowship I was missing. To this date, I have never found it again, and I can't help but marvel at the irony that when I didn't want the help, it was there; when I needed it, it was nowhere to be found.
I've tried to steer that need, tried to channel it into a ministry of my own, but I can't. There are aspects of it that I can't do, where I am ill equipped. And in the meantime, I've punched the clock on job after job that might mean something to someone else, but means very little to me.
I am exhausted. I am sick, tired, and fed up.
And yet, in all of this, I have to ask: WHERE IS THE CHURCH? God set a very specific plan in place, and charged His people with feeding His flock. Feeding the hungry, healing the sick, housing the homeless, befriending the lonely...all...ALL of it fits under God's plan. Yet we'd rather fill ourselves with pithy feel good stories, show up on Sunday and put our money in the plate and all it good.
A few years ago, a famous author put out a book called "The Prayer of Jabez". It was a bestseller. Unfortunately, it was as misguided as it was popular. See, the author thought that Jabez was simply looking to get wealthy and that God rewarded him. Wrong; Jabez' prayer was that he would no longer cause pain to those around him.
I know that prayer because I've prayed it myself many times over. And I know that others know that prayer because you can see it expressed in the song "Hurt", recorded by Nine Inch Nails and later Johnny Cash.
We live in a world where we think "stuff" eases pain. Where is we create enough noise, perhaps we cannot hear the cry of our conscience when we see a hungry child, or a homeless man walking the streets asking us to spare just a pittance of the wealth with which we have been blessed.
We can do better. We MUST do better. Now is the time for the church to act. Never have we been more needed. Please take the time to reach out to your friends and family, to love them as Jesus loved them, and to just listen. You will give them more than you know.
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