If You Can't Love ME, You'll Have a Hard Time Loving Others

It's been implied by people who genuinely care about me that I'm caustic. And it's not entirely an untrue charge. After twenty five years of rejection by my fellow Christians, I think that some level of irritation is probably pretty much in line.

My latest, and very likely last, attempt to "fit in" with a congregation put the icing on the cake. In 15 months with the church, we received exactly one invitation to fellowship with another group out of church, and that group is long gone. Not one of the "inner circle" so much as invited us over for a barbeque (with the exception of a birthday party for our six year old, but that's not really a family invitation).

And, more recently, I made a cold call to on of the prominent members of the church who used to be very warm to me (and had even suggested he had some IT work available). It seemed natural, now that I am freelancing, to follow up. He not only didn't return my calls, but called in another tech to bid on a very substantial job. I would have chalked it up to a message not passed on, only he admitted to the other tech that he knew I was working for myself and refused to work with me. That's the old Christian love coming out, I guess.

The truth is, if you can't love me, you'll have a hard time loving others. And I'm not saying this as a simple matter of judging others; I actually struggle intensely with this myself. I have had people approach me that I had a hard time accepting, and I admit, it's not easy.

But it IS possible. And not only possible, but commanded.

The truth is, if every person walking into a Christian church was treated with warmth and acceptance, there would't be such negativity. It has been said that Christianity is the only army that shoots its own wounded.

The "mainstream" church has basically written me off as a heretic. I'm OK with that; I know where I stand and really don't care what others think anymore. But I DO care about the image that those who claim to be standard bearers for the church are projecting on people who need the Gospel.