I'm at that age where ghosts of my past keep popping up where I least expect them, reminding me of what could have been, and a little bit of the journey I expected to take when I was younger.
The journey since has been nothing like that. As a young convert to Christianity, I sincerely believed I was meant for ministry. To me that meant being a pastor somewhere, or a missionary; really, anywhere God wanted me.
And I started off with that in mind. I went briefly to a small Baptist Bible College, but was struck by the inherent hypocrisy of a school that did not allow students to attend movies, but said nothing when the students would gather together in their homes and watch the same movies. It's more likely than anything that the college was just not a good fit for me, but I really didn't see any other option at the time.
And then I moved back home for a span of three years, continuing my college experience, but being stifled by the intricacies of the student loan system. A technicality made it a monumental hurdle to get financial aid until I was 24, and I was unwilling to jump those hurdles.
Then came family. It wasn't long until I was a parent, and put that on the backseat at a number of low to mediocre paying jobs, putting in long hours. All that became important in that stage in life was holding through to the next paycheck.
Then a series of steps led to where I am now, finished with a degree, but not really in the direction I had once considered, and with the thoughts of "ministry" I had when I was younger all but over. In sum total, my "career" in the pulpit lasted all of three sermons as part of a group of people who filled in for a rural Oklahoma church. The disappointment of never being able to launch in something that was very dear to me, something to which I have always believed that I was called, left me bitter. And it didn't help that I was watching as many of the churches I saw were completely being swallowed up by a materialism and secularism that were certainly not Christ's intent.
But gradually, time has led me to understand that ministry is not confined to the face in the pulpit; that there are a lot of ministers out there that nobody will ever see, and that for reasons not completely known to me (although I know some of them), that just might be God's direction for me. That maybe, just maybe, the marks I leave on those around me won't be seen until after I'm gone. And that, while I may never preach another sermon from a pulpit in my life, that doesn't mean that I'm not preaching through my actions.
I don't feel comfortable sharing the opportunities that have opened up for me lately. I don't feel it's right. But it's my prayer that somehow my life can steer more over time towards Kingdom work than the tedious work often needed to sustain ourselves in this life.
But what I've had to come to grips with is the fact those opportunities have always been there, they just come without applause.
And I'm OK with that.
Sunday, December 28, 2014
Friday, December 26, 2014
Reflections at Year's End
I haven't yet read the conclusions of Ryan Bell's "A Year Without God". But I have appreciated all of his posts throughout the year. They have challenged me, angered me, inspired me. I have found much solace in his skilled presentation and intellectual honesty in asking some of the questions we would often rather avoid.
Mr. Bell, if you ever read this, I thank you. And if you ever happen by a certain burg in Northeastern New Mexico, the coffee's on me.
I wanted to write these reflections prior to reading Bell's, because I want them to be free of the color I might find in his. I admittedly have not read many of these atheist/humanist authors, and have little interest in doing so, but that doesn't mean that I don't find validity in it.
So, introduction aside, here are my year end thoughts, jumbled as they may be:
The first verse of the Bible begins, "In the beginning, God...". Proceeding through 807,361 words in 66 books of the canonical Scriptures, it ends with "The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you all. Amen". (Rev. 22:21).
In the beginning, God... In the end, grace. Something to think about, and something that has had deep and profound meaning through the year, as I watched some people dear to me struggle with some difficult, life altering realities that I will not discuss in depth here because it is simply too soon.
This was a very, intensely painful year for me. But then growth often is. I have shed a lot of tears in the past 360 days, and as the year winds down, I find myself wondering if the current quiet is a genuine peace or merely the calm before the storm. I found myself withdrawing increasingly inside myself because of genuinely feeling that I lacked a strong support group.
And through it all I found comfort in the words of Mr. Bell. Not because I agreed with some of the explorations that he made, but because I highly respect anyone who is willing to step so far outside their comfort zone in order to examine who they personally are. For everything I endured, I am sure it paled in comparison to some of his struggles. And, sadly, it showed some of the inadequacies of "traditional" evangelicalism.
And it was in that climate that I felt compelled to renounce evangelicalism. When I saw, for a second year in a row, the media centered on the shooting of an unarmed person of color, it called into question whether there was anything left worth redeeming in today's church. I've long struggled within around the conflict between the evangelical gospel and the social gospel, which gets you branded a liberal, a communist, or worse. And in the course of renouncing evangelicalism, I had to question whether I was, indeed, renouncing the church.
But there was something in that: Christ loves the church enough that He gave himself for her. That means, for better or worse, my struggle is not against the church, no matter how imperfect she may be.
In the beginning, God. In the end, grace.
Personally, this was the year that I realized that any aspirations to the American middle class are gone. That I can't pour enough money into my education to make that happen, and that it's done. And that I should learn to be comfortable with what I have, because it likely will not improve much.
After much bitterness, I'm surprisingly OK with that. Of course it helps that, in addition to my small income streams elsewhere, I am doing something I truly, genuinely enjoy.
This has been a truly special year on many fronts. I will post more between now and year's end, but cannot help going back to the discovery above: in the beginning, God... In the end, grace.
Mr. Bell, if you ever read this, I thank you. And if you ever happen by a certain burg in Northeastern New Mexico, the coffee's on me.
I wanted to write these reflections prior to reading Bell's, because I want them to be free of the color I might find in his. I admittedly have not read many of these atheist/humanist authors, and have little interest in doing so, but that doesn't mean that I don't find validity in it.
So, introduction aside, here are my year end thoughts, jumbled as they may be:
The first verse of the Bible begins, "In the beginning, God...". Proceeding through 807,361 words in 66 books of the canonical Scriptures, it ends with "The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you all. Amen". (Rev. 22:21).
In the beginning, God... In the end, grace. Something to think about, and something that has had deep and profound meaning through the year, as I watched some people dear to me struggle with some difficult, life altering realities that I will not discuss in depth here because it is simply too soon.
This was a very, intensely painful year for me. But then growth often is. I have shed a lot of tears in the past 360 days, and as the year winds down, I find myself wondering if the current quiet is a genuine peace or merely the calm before the storm. I found myself withdrawing increasingly inside myself because of genuinely feeling that I lacked a strong support group.
And through it all I found comfort in the words of Mr. Bell. Not because I agreed with some of the explorations that he made, but because I highly respect anyone who is willing to step so far outside their comfort zone in order to examine who they personally are. For everything I endured, I am sure it paled in comparison to some of his struggles. And, sadly, it showed some of the inadequacies of "traditional" evangelicalism.
And it was in that climate that I felt compelled to renounce evangelicalism. When I saw, for a second year in a row, the media centered on the shooting of an unarmed person of color, it called into question whether there was anything left worth redeeming in today's church. I've long struggled within around the conflict between the evangelical gospel and the social gospel, which gets you branded a liberal, a communist, or worse. And in the course of renouncing evangelicalism, I had to question whether I was, indeed, renouncing the church.
But there was something in that: Christ loves the church enough that He gave himself for her. That means, for better or worse, my struggle is not against the church, no matter how imperfect she may be.
In the beginning, God. In the end, grace.
Personally, this was the year that I realized that any aspirations to the American middle class are gone. That I can't pour enough money into my education to make that happen, and that it's done. And that I should learn to be comfortable with what I have, because it likely will not improve much.
After much bitterness, I'm surprisingly OK with that. Of course it helps that, in addition to my small income streams elsewhere, I am doing something I truly, genuinely enjoy.
This has been a truly special year on many fronts. I will post more between now and year's end, but cannot help going back to the discovery above: in the beginning, God... In the end, grace.
Thursday, November 13, 2014
Feeling Alone In All of This
I have a few people who have seen articles I've posted here, but not the whole story. It's like walking into the middle of a movie, sometimes you see the bitter, but you don't see what led to that point.
I am at the moment feeling angry, frustrated, and exhausted. And it is very much at the heart of why I feel the church has let me down. It's not a matter of me having unrealistic expectations of the church, these expectations are very realistic.
But let me be clear in saying they're not the "pastor's" job. More than a few people play a part. Building friendships within the church is part of the disciple making process.
Anyway, I had to reveal some information to my daughter that was very painful to discuss. For her privacy I am not going to be terribly specific. But the last time we had this discussion, it cost me six months' time with my daughter, including her senior track season, and all of the other senior activities. I will never have those back.
Through this all, I had no support. I did not have a single friend outside the family to turn to. People made assumptions about my character, and hers, that were untrue. They never TOLD us, though, they just made horrible sweeping assumptions.
When I needed backup it wasn't there. When I needed the guidance of wise counsel, it was similarly absent. Nothing there to help me. I was on my own.
To pretend this is the way the church was meant to be is to pretend that much of the Scripture doesn't exist. Parenting, especially through the teenage and adult years, is exceedingly difficult, and backup is needed. Eyes and ears help as well.
I feel right now that we're in a better place, a good fellowship working to be responsive to all of this, and I am and will attempt to be patient. But healing is much more easily accomplished when everyone acknowledges their role. This is something I have had to navigate on my own, and with the judgment and stares of others to accompany it.
I know that we as a church can do better. And I pray that conviction comes to the churches that need to fill the gaps. I know that the last year has certainly changed my viewpoint substantially and for the better, and as a result at this point I am not bitter, just exhausted.
And similarly determined to help make sure that other people don't feel the same way.
Recently I was discussing the parable of the Good Samaritan with a friend, and he disagreed with my analysis, saying "are you bleeding and lying by the side of the road?"
I didn't think then to answer, but am answering now: No, but not long ago I was. And I was passed by more times than I should have been.
I am at the moment feeling angry, frustrated, and exhausted. And it is very much at the heart of why I feel the church has let me down. It's not a matter of me having unrealistic expectations of the church, these expectations are very realistic.
But let me be clear in saying they're not the "pastor's" job. More than a few people play a part. Building friendships within the church is part of the disciple making process.
Anyway, I had to reveal some information to my daughter that was very painful to discuss. For her privacy I am not going to be terribly specific. But the last time we had this discussion, it cost me six months' time with my daughter, including her senior track season, and all of the other senior activities. I will never have those back.
Through this all, I had no support. I did not have a single friend outside the family to turn to. People made assumptions about my character, and hers, that were untrue. They never TOLD us, though, they just made horrible sweeping assumptions.
When I needed backup it wasn't there. When I needed the guidance of wise counsel, it was similarly absent. Nothing there to help me. I was on my own.
To pretend this is the way the church was meant to be is to pretend that much of the Scripture doesn't exist. Parenting, especially through the teenage and adult years, is exceedingly difficult, and backup is needed. Eyes and ears help as well.
I feel right now that we're in a better place, a good fellowship working to be responsive to all of this, and I am and will attempt to be patient. But healing is much more easily accomplished when everyone acknowledges their role. This is something I have had to navigate on my own, and with the judgment and stares of others to accompany it.
I know that we as a church can do better. And I pray that conviction comes to the churches that need to fill the gaps. I know that the last year has certainly changed my viewpoint substantially and for the better, and as a result at this point I am not bitter, just exhausted.
And similarly determined to help make sure that other people don't feel the same way.
Recently I was discussing the parable of the Good Samaritan with a friend, and he disagreed with my analysis, saying "are you bleeding and lying by the side of the road?"
I didn't think then to answer, but am answering now: No, but not long ago I was. And I was passed by more times than I should have been.
Wednesday, October 22, 2014
What I wish the Church Understood About Ministry, Part 2.
Note: I unwittingly discovered Blogspot has limits to the blog length. You can read part one of this article here.
Moving on to the fourth point in the article:
4. A church is a place where I can use my gifts, passion, skills, personality and life experiences to serve, but it’s up to me to become a servant. (Matthew 20:28)
This is my single biggest pet peeve about the article. First let me say that the writer is absolutely spot on, but he is ignoring something I have seen consistently in many churches. And for me it has been the primary reason for moving on.
There are people in the congregation who desperately long to serve, but are never given the chance. I know because I have often been one of them. When I became a Christian, I hit the ground running, eager to serve. One of the requirements of the Bible College I attended was to be involved in service to your local congregation. As a new Christian with a LOT of baggage, I knew I was not spiritually ready to lead, so I discussed it with my pastor, and agreed to be the janitor/groundskeeper for the church.
When I returned to my advisor, he stated simply, "we are looking for something more spiritual in nature".
That's one of those conversations I wish I had back, because today I would have no difficulty explaining how serving by maintaining the premises can be just as spiritual as leading worship, but I can't go back to that point. But I have experienced many such instances in multiple churches, and have seen people who wish to serve pushed aside for various reasons, either because those in charge felt their abilities weren't good enough, or because they felt the person wasn't spiritual enough. I suspect that it's often been the latter in my case, but I can never be sure; at any rate, I've never felt the need to PROVE my spirituality.
I will note in this that in one case the failure to click into an area of ministry was my fault, but that's one case out of several.
Eventually, my quest to serve became less and less ministry centric, and I tried to concentrate on things like hanging around and helping cleanup after church meals, or assisting when numbers are needed; but the majority of my focus has been outside the church walls. My heart is geared to the homeless, and that is where I focus my ministry, because it's one of the few places where my offering is accepted.
On to point 5, the final point:
5. A church is a place where I have the chance to change the world by fulfilling the Great Commission, but it’s up to me to actually become a person of impact. (Romans 10:14)
This statement is absolutely correct, and I have nothing to add to it. But there is a sub point that in my opinion is potentially the most dangerous point of the article:
Churches exist for the purpose of their non-members.
They do not exist to serve the whims of their members.
Now it's true that churches do not exist to serve the whims of their members, the concept that they exist solely for members is wrong, wrong, wrong. It is entirely misguided, it is bad theology, and it is antithetical to EVERYTHING Jesus taught.
Given the fact that the author put together a generally well written article, I am willing to concede context and accept that he may not have meant that exactly as it is read, but the church is as much a place to nurture and grow its members as it is to encourage nonmembers. It is, in many ways, a nest, where we are to feel its comfort and protection, but we must leave as we learn to fly and soar.
And it is, most importantly, still there for us, still beckoning, when we fall.
And again, carefully noting that I do not believe the author intended it this way based on everything else they wrote, I will continue on the point about the church existing exclusively for its nonmembers, as it is a misconception I have seen churches hold.
If the church exists only for its nonmembers, then why do you solicit my attendance, my tithes? I know why, of course, and the above points spell it out, but we must not allow ourselves to fall into the thinking that we can neglect the needs of the faithful at the expense of the unsaved. That can only lead away from Christ, not towards him.
In writing this, I am hoping the reader understands it was written not to argue the quite valid points presented, but to offer another side, another perspective. And hope that can lead us to deepen our ministries.
Moving on to the fourth point in the article:
4. A church is a place where I can use my gifts, passion, skills, personality and life experiences to serve, but it’s up to me to become a servant. (Matthew 20:28)
This is my single biggest pet peeve about the article. First let me say that the writer is absolutely spot on, but he is ignoring something I have seen consistently in many churches. And for me it has been the primary reason for moving on.
There are people in the congregation who desperately long to serve, but are never given the chance. I know because I have often been one of them. When I became a Christian, I hit the ground running, eager to serve. One of the requirements of the Bible College I attended was to be involved in service to your local congregation. As a new Christian with a LOT of baggage, I knew I was not spiritually ready to lead, so I discussed it with my pastor, and agreed to be the janitor/groundskeeper for the church.
When I returned to my advisor, he stated simply, "we are looking for something more spiritual in nature".
That's one of those conversations I wish I had back, because today I would have no difficulty explaining how serving by maintaining the premises can be just as spiritual as leading worship, but I can't go back to that point. But I have experienced many such instances in multiple churches, and have seen people who wish to serve pushed aside for various reasons, either because those in charge felt their abilities weren't good enough, or because they felt the person wasn't spiritual enough. I suspect that it's often been the latter in my case, but I can never be sure; at any rate, I've never felt the need to PROVE my spirituality.
I will note in this that in one case the failure to click into an area of ministry was my fault, but that's one case out of several.
Eventually, my quest to serve became less and less ministry centric, and I tried to concentrate on things like hanging around and helping cleanup after church meals, or assisting when numbers are needed; but the majority of my focus has been outside the church walls. My heart is geared to the homeless, and that is where I focus my ministry, because it's one of the few places where my offering is accepted.
On to point 5, the final point:
5. A church is a place where I have the chance to change the world by fulfilling the Great Commission, but it’s up to me to actually become a person of impact. (Romans 10:14)
This statement is absolutely correct, and I have nothing to add to it. But there is a sub point that in my opinion is potentially the most dangerous point of the article:
Churches exist for the purpose of their non-members.
They do not exist to serve the whims of their members.
Now it's true that churches do not exist to serve the whims of their members, the concept that they exist solely for members is wrong, wrong, wrong. It is entirely misguided, it is bad theology, and it is antithetical to EVERYTHING Jesus taught.
Given the fact that the author put together a generally well written article, I am willing to concede context and accept that he may not have meant that exactly as it is read, but the church is as much a place to nurture and grow its members as it is to encourage nonmembers. It is, in many ways, a nest, where we are to feel its comfort and protection, but we must leave as we learn to fly and soar.
And it is, most importantly, still there for us, still beckoning, when we fall.
And again, carefully noting that I do not believe the author intended it this way based on everything else they wrote, I will continue on the point about the church existing exclusively for its nonmembers, as it is a misconception I have seen churches hold.
If the church exists only for its nonmembers, then why do you solicit my attendance, my tithes? I know why, of course, and the above points spell it out, but we must not allow ourselves to fall into the thinking that we can neglect the needs of the faithful at the expense of the unsaved. That can only lead away from Christ, not towards him.
In writing this, I am hoping the reader understands it was written not to argue the quite valid points presented, but to offer another side, another perspective. And hope that can lead us to deepen our ministries.
What I Wish the Church Understood About Ministry, Part 1
I recently read an article that my pastor posted about how the church does not exist to serve. It is a fairly well written article, and there are several good points about it. I want to note before proceeding that this piece is not to attack the article and its valid points, but to provide perspective from the other side. The article referenced can be found here.
First, merely for perspective, a bit about me: I accepted Christ in 1988, and was then and am now an enthusiastic Christian with a desire to serve, grow, and minister. I spent a year in a small Baptist Bible College until my funds ran out, and have spent the remaining years desperately trying to find a church where I belong in the sense that they need me as much as I need them. I have not found that church, and that is, in all candor, why this page exists. I am long past the bitterness and have moved on to accept that God's will for my life does not include a role in active ministry.
But that is enough about me. Now let's move on to the article.The first point the author presents is as follows:
A church is a place to gather weekly for worship, but it’s up to me whether I will experience the presence of God. (John 4:24)
This point is spot on, but it does a very slight disservice in ignoring the role of the ministers who present the service. If you're not connecting with the majority of your congregation, you're doing it wrong.
Now I admit if I'm the standalone guy who is not getting it while the others are, we have a problem. But if your church is not growing spiritually, it may be time to head home and look in the mirror. I have seen churches of all style and no substance, and it's pretty tough to grow when the soil isn't deep enough for you to spread our your roots.
The second point is one where I begin to take issue:
2. A church is a family I can belong to, but it’s up to me to develop friendships. (Proverbs 18:24)
This seems good, and it is, again, more true than not, but it isn't the whole picture. Building friendships is a two way street, and it is equally the responsibility of the members of the church to work on friendship building with people who come in their doors. That is a major weakness of evangelism; so much effort is spent in bringing people to the cross that little effort is spent on them once they get there.
Now, I will say that if someone isn't taking advantage of the opportunities the church provides, then they are not holding up their end of the bargain. I have, however, in my lifetime, observed one truth about people: there are some people who are very hard to love in a Christian way. I gather from a lifetime of reactions that I am one of them, but I have certainly never tried to be. It is our job to reach out, to love them in spite of the obstacles, and to love them through whatever traits they have. These things are temporary; their souls are eternal.
I have long said that if a church was not ready to accept an alcoholic who came in the door just hours removed from their last drink, they are not truly evangelical. People come broken, and while it is not our job to "fix" them, it IS our job to provide a place where they can be healed, and to direct them in all sincerity to the One who CAN heal.
Matthew 28:19 urges us:
Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit,
As I once told a friend, we're doing a great job of going, not so much of making disciples. Mentoring and discipleship are as important as evangelism, perhaps more so.
Let me say before moving on that I recognize that this is easier said than done. But we are called to do difficult, even impossible, things through Christ.
Moving on:
3. A church is place where gifted teachers will explain the Bible and how I can apply it to my life, but it’s up to me to align my life with God’s truth. (James 1:22)
This is where the disciple making part of the church comes in.
I came to Christ in jail because of a serious misstep I made when I was barely 18. What I found when I was inside the jail was an amazing support group of sincere Christians, and that followed me outside the jail while I was still in the Pacific Northwest.
About six months after I was released, I was driving through a bad neighborhood. As I drove by, I briefly caught a glimpse of one of the men who had regularly attended our fellowship. He didn't look good. You could see at a glance he had fallen back into his old lifestyle, his old habits.
This image has haunted me since that day. As a more mature Christian, I'd like to think I would put the brakes on, hop out of the car, and go speak with him, and invite him over to visit. I can't say in all honesty that I would, but I would like to think I would.
To put the entire burden on me to align my life with God's truth is to put aside a great deal of the Gospel. The truth is, I am fallen, you are fallen, and we often need the assistance of others (including and especially the Holy Spirit) to make that connection. Proverbs 27:17 tells us:
As iron sharpens iron,
so one person sharpens another.
Galatians 6:2 further elaborates on this point:
Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.
Yes, ultimately I, and only I, am responsible for the steps I take to draw closer to God. But as Paul compares us to "babes in Christ", I would say that process is better achieved through the assistance and encouragement of those around me. It's a process that must be relearned, and it is up to each of us to help teach us.
The article uses the example of a money course, and asks if they've made the changes where he had encouraged them. And yet, even the author of the course he is clearly referencing will tell you the relearning process is exceedingly difficult.
Looking at the political landscape, I can't help but realize we are about twenty years removed from the height of the "Promisekeepers" movement. And it looks very compellingly like a lot of the promises made in that heightened state have not been kept. I remember standing in a chorus of men's voices filling Soldier Field in Chicago, and I can't help but wonder how many of those men have left their wives, have abandoned those covenants, and forgotten what they stood for. And while it would be wrong to blame it on the church, there is good cause to wonder if the fellowship they have experienced since has nurtured and encouraged them to keep those vows.
First, merely for perspective, a bit about me: I accepted Christ in 1988, and was then and am now an enthusiastic Christian with a desire to serve, grow, and minister. I spent a year in a small Baptist Bible College until my funds ran out, and have spent the remaining years desperately trying to find a church where I belong in the sense that they need me as much as I need them. I have not found that church, and that is, in all candor, why this page exists. I am long past the bitterness and have moved on to accept that God's will for my life does not include a role in active ministry.
But that is enough about me. Now let's move on to the article.The first point the author presents is as follows:
A church is a place to gather weekly for worship, but it’s up to me whether I will experience the presence of God. (John 4:24)
This point is spot on, but it does a very slight disservice in ignoring the role of the ministers who present the service. If you're not connecting with the majority of your congregation, you're doing it wrong.
Now I admit if I'm the standalone guy who is not getting it while the others are, we have a problem. But if your church is not growing spiritually, it may be time to head home and look in the mirror. I have seen churches of all style and no substance, and it's pretty tough to grow when the soil isn't deep enough for you to spread our your roots.
The second point is one where I begin to take issue:
2. A church is a family I can belong to, but it’s up to me to develop friendships. (Proverbs 18:24)
This seems good, and it is, again, more true than not, but it isn't the whole picture. Building friendships is a two way street, and it is equally the responsibility of the members of the church to work on friendship building with people who come in their doors. That is a major weakness of evangelism; so much effort is spent in bringing people to the cross that little effort is spent on them once they get there.
Now, I will say that if someone isn't taking advantage of the opportunities the church provides, then they are not holding up their end of the bargain. I have, however, in my lifetime, observed one truth about people: there are some people who are very hard to love in a Christian way. I gather from a lifetime of reactions that I am one of them, but I have certainly never tried to be. It is our job to reach out, to love them in spite of the obstacles, and to love them through whatever traits they have. These things are temporary; their souls are eternal.
I have long said that if a church was not ready to accept an alcoholic who came in the door just hours removed from their last drink, they are not truly evangelical. People come broken, and while it is not our job to "fix" them, it IS our job to provide a place where they can be healed, and to direct them in all sincerity to the One who CAN heal.
Matthew 28:19 urges us:
Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit,
As I once told a friend, we're doing a great job of going, not so much of making disciples. Mentoring and discipleship are as important as evangelism, perhaps more so.
Let me say before moving on that I recognize that this is easier said than done. But we are called to do difficult, even impossible, things through Christ.
Moving on:
3. A church is place where gifted teachers will explain the Bible and how I can apply it to my life, but it’s up to me to align my life with God’s truth. (James 1:22)
This is where the disciple making part of the church comes in.
I came to Christ in jail because of a serious misstep I made when I was barely 18. What I found when I was inside the jail was an amazing support group of sincere Christians, and that followed me outside the jail while I was still in the Pacific Northwest.
About six months after I was released, I was driving through a bad neighborhood. As I drove by, I briefly caught a glimpse of one of the men who had regularly attended our fellowship. He didn't look good. You could see at a glance he had fallen back into his old lifestyle, his old habits.
This image has haunted me since that day. As a more mature Christian, I'd like to think I would put the brakes on, hop out of the car, and go speak with him, and invite him over to visit. I can't say in all honesty that I would, but I would like to think I would.
To put the entire burden on me to align my life with God's truth is to put aside a great deal of the Gospel. The truth is, I am fallen, you are fallen, and we often need the assistance of others (including and especially the Holy Spirit) to make that connection. Proverbs 27:17 tells us:
As iron sharpens iron,
so one person sharpens another.
Galatians 6:2 further elaborates on this point:
Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.
Yes, ultimately I, and only I, am responsible for the steps I take to draw closer to God. But as Paul compares us to "babes in Christ", I would say that process is better achieved through the assistance and encouragement of those around me. It's a process that must be relearned, and it is up to each of us to help teach us.
The article uses the example of a money course, and asks if they've made the changes where he had encouraged them. And yet, even the author of the course he is clearly referencing will tell you the relearning process is exceedingly difficult.
Looking at the political landscape, I can't help but realize we are about twenty years removed from the height of the "Promisekeepers" movement. And it looks very compellingly like a lot of the promises made in that heightened state have not been kept. I remember standing in a chorus of men's voices filling Soldier Field in Chicago, and I can't help but wonder how many of those men have left their wives, have abandoned those covenants, and forgotten what they stood for. And while it would be wrong to blame it on the church, there is good cause to wonder if the fellowship they have experienced since has nurtured and encouraged them to keep those vows.
Sunday, September 21, 2014
Oklahoma's Black Mass and the Christian Response
I don't currently still live in Oklahoma, but I have friends responding to the black mass occurring at the Civic Center.
I should not need to, but will add the disclaimer that as a Christian, I am disturbed by this. Deeply. And it's frankly not a subject for debate with me on a personal level.
Unfortunately, though, in blurring the lines between church and state, this is something that the church has brought on itself. The government simply does not have authority to ban the free exercise of religion, and if you insist that public space be used for Christian worship, it must be available to all faiths. The Constitution is pretty clear on this.
As to the concerns that God will stop blessing us as a nation, or Oklahoma as a state, where were those concerns when protestors spoke up against the immigrant children held in Ft. Sill, only an hour's drive from the site of today's mass and protests? In the light of Leviticus 19:33-34, can the protestors truly be claiming the moral high ground?
When a stranger sojourns with you in your land, you shall not do him wrong. You shall treat the stranger who sojourns with you as the native among you, and you shall love him as yourself, for you were strangers in the land of Egypt: I am the Lord your God. (Lev. 19:33-34)
And what of Governor Fallin's legislation to prevent cities from voting a higher minimum wage than the state? Is it a Christian act to deny workers a better wage to care for their families?
What of the education and the promise to tomorrow's youth? Do those represent Christian values?
Although I left Oklahoma years ago, my heart never has. The problem I see in Oklahoma does not lie with the people in the Civic Center basement performing the black mass. It lies in those protesting outside, who concern themselves more with regulating the lives of those who do not hold their faiths than they do with being salt and light in their communities and in their state.
It does not matter how many Ten Commandments monuments or crosses you erect; all you are doing with that is trading one idol for another. What matters is how you live your faith.
And, although there will always be people who are hostile to the Christian faith, it is possible they might find it harder to gather likeminded followers if we were more persistent and dedicated in walking the walk on a daily basis.
So, protest YOURSELVES, and what you have allowed Oklahoma to become: a state with poor educational rankings, high child poverty, and low household income. I am fairly certain that none of those things are consistent with being dedicated Christians.
I should not need to, but will add the disclaimer that as a Christian, I am disturbed by this. Deeply. And it's frankly not a subject for debate with me on a personal level.
Unfortunately, though, in blurring the lines between church and state, this is something that the church has brought on itself. The government simply does not have authority to ban the free exercise of religion, and if you insist that public space be used for Christian worship, it must be available to all faiths. The Constitution is pretty clear on this.
As to the concerns that God will stop blessing us as a nation, or Oklahoma as a state, where were those concerns when protestors spoke up against the immigrant children held in Ft. Sill, only an hour's drive from the site of today's mass and protests? In the light of Leviticus 19:33-34, can the protestors truly be claiming the moral high ground?
When a stranger sojourns with you in your land, you shall not do him wrong. You shall treat the stranger who sojourns with you as the native among you, and you shall love him as yourself, for you were strangers in the land of Egypt: I am the Lord your God. (Lev. 19:33-34)
And what of Governor Fallin's legislation to prevent cities from voting a higher minimum wage than the state? Is it a Christian act to deny workers a better wage to care for their families?
What of the education and the promise to tomorrow's youth? Do those represent Christian values?
Although I left Oklahoma years ago, my heart never has. The problem I see in Oklahoma does not lie with the people in the Civic Center basement performing the black mass. It lies in those protesting outside, who concern themselves more with regulating the lives of those who do not hold their faiths than they do with being salt and light in their communities and in their state.
It does not matter how many Ten Commandments monuments or crosses you erect; all you are doing with that is trading one idol for another. What matters is how you live your faith.
And, although there will always be people who are hostile to the Christian faith, it is possible they might find it harder to gather likeminded followers if we were more persistent and dedicated in walking the walk on a daily basis.
So, protest YOURSELVES, and what you have allowed Oklahoma to become: a state with poor educational rankings, high child poverty, and low household income. I am fairly certain that none of those things are consistent with being dedicated Christians.
Wednesday, September 17, 2014
On Adrian Peterson and "Discipline"
I hate to write this article. But I have to. Because it speaks to a portion of the problems I have with the church.
The Adrian Peterson situation has brought the issue of child abuse to the forefront. There are a lot of opinions, and there is a lot of emotion on this issue, on both sides of the fence. And it causes a lot of people to really look at and evaluate their thoughts on discipline.
If you are conservative, traditional Christians, I am going to warn you I am probably about to piss you off. Probably better to stop reading if you cannot take a contradictory opinion.
I was raised up believing there was a difference between a spanking and a beating, and I will admit that from the child's perspective, there certainly is. I've had both, and can tell you there is a difference between not being able to sit down comfortably for days and the stinging rebuke of what Adrian Peterson calls "a whupping".
But does that mean either is right? Does a lesser degree of pain somehow make the message any more proper? If you rate spankings on a scale of 1 to 10, with one definitely being acceptable, and 10 definitely being acceptable, where does the acceptable line get drawn? A 6? a 5? And who determines what constitutes a 6 or a 5?
The conservative church holds out that parents who don't spank their children are neglecting discipline. But is that what discipline really is? If you have to beat your child to follow you, what happens when they become bigger and more powerful? And when we discipline adults, we certainly find ways to do it that don't involve finding a blunt object and applying it to someone's backsides.
This is one area that's reaffirming my decision to renounce evangelical Christianity. Because a very significant part of the spanking culture is a direct result of the teachings of the church.
If you are a new parent begging for parental advice, you will undoubtedly be given a copy of a James Dobson book, which strongly advocates corporal punishment. Worse, you may be given a copy of Michael and Debbie Pearls' book, To Train Up a Child, which I was given when our children were much younger, and which I had to put away after the first chapter.
The problem is, parents who spank their children believe they are doing the right thing. Either through family or church, they believe that this is the way to parent. The people who are teaching that need to own that.
As I grow older, I am increasingly convinced that violence is not a solution in any instance. And I have to wonder if teaching a child that might makes right from an early age doesn't have a good deal to do with the problems we have before us today.
Advocates of corporal punishment will insist that "families that whupped their kids did fine for thousands of years", but they do so based on empirical evidence, and, increasingly in a frightening vacuum where they seriously fear higher education. Is it any coincidence that we emphasize corporal punishment more than any other culture, and we have the highest incarceration rate.
This, like so many other thoughts I've been having, is not an easy one. It is hard going forward in my faith journey accepting that so much of what I was taught by people who sincerely believed is wrong, but honestly I cannot see violence towards another person as being Godly in any sense of the word.
There will be those who will toss out Proverbs 13:24 at me ("he who spares the rod hates his son"), but the rod was used to guide; it was not used to beat the sheep, and the analogy, like many Biblical analogies, was written for shepherds to understand.
So when is a spanking right, and when does it become a beating? at a 3? at a 7? I am not going to come out and tell anyone what to do, but I do think it's a question we should be asking. Because, after all, none of us would knowingly harm our children. So it is in our own best interests to ask whether our actions are unknowingly doing so.
The Adrian Peterson situation has brought the issue of child abuse to the forefront. There are a lot of opinions, and there is a lot of emotion on this issue, on both sides of the fence. And it causes a lot of people to really look at and evaluate their thoughts on discipline.
If you are conservative, traditional Christians, I am going to warn you I am probably about to piss you off. Probably better to stop reading if you cannot take a contradictory opinion.
I was raised up believing there was a difference between a spanking and a beating, and I will admit that from the child's perspective, there certainly is. I've had both, and can tell you there is a difference between not being able to sit down comfortably for days and the stinging rebuke of what Adrian Peterson calls "a whupping".
But does that mean either is right? Does a lesser degree of pain somehow make the message any more proper? If you rate spankings on a scale of 1 to 10, with one definitely being acceptable, and 10 definitely being acceptable, where does the acceptable line get drawn? A 6? a 5? And who determines what constitutes a 6 or a 5?
The conservative church holds out that parents who don't spank their children are neglecting discipline. But is that what discipline really is? If you have to beat your child to follow you, what happens when they become bigger and more powerful? And when we discipline adults, we certainly find ways to do it that don't involve finding a blunt object and applying it to someone's backsides.
This is one area that's reaffirming my decision to renounce evangelical Christianity. Because a very significant part of the spanking culture is a direct result of the teachings of the church.
If you are a new parent begging for parental advice, you will undoubtedly be given a copy of a James Dobson book, which strongly advocates corporal punishment. Worse, you may be given a copy of Michael and Debbie Pearls' book, To Train Up a Child, which I was given when our children were much younger, and which I had to put away after the first chapter.
The problem is, parents who spank their children believe they are doing the right thing. Either through family or church, they believe that this is the way to parent. The people who are teaching that need to own that.
As I grow older, I am increasingly convinced that violence is not a solution in any instance. And I have to wonder if teaching a child that might makes right from an early age doesn't have a good deal to do with the problems we have before us today.
Advocates of corporal punishment will insist that "families that whupped their kids did fine for thousands of years", but they do so based on empirical evidence, and, increasingly in a frightening vacuum where they seriously fear higher education. Is it any coincidence that we emphasize corporal punishment more than any other culture, and we have the highest incarceration rate.
This, like so many other thoughts I've been having, is not an easy one. It is hard going forward in my faith journey accepting that so much of what I was taught by people who sincerely believed is wrong, but honestly I cannot see violence towards another person as being Godly in any sense of the word.
There will be those who will toss out Proverbs 13:24 at me ("he who spares the rod hates his son"), but the rod was used to guide; it was not used to beat the sheep, and the analogy, like many Biblical analogies, was written for shepherds to understand.
So when is a spanking right, and when does it become a beating? at a 3? at a 7? I am not going to come out and tell anyone what to do, but I do think it's a question we should be asking. Because, after all, none of us would knowingly harm our children. So it is in our own best interests to ask whether our actions are unknowingly doing so.
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